Letting Go

Yesterday I felt addressed as I saw the lively rush of a stream in an otherwise frozen and motionless terrain. I had been feeling stagnant and the water reminded me to let that kind of movement and vitality flow through my internal landscape. Today the stream is talking to me some more. February 4, 32 years ago today, I got married. The marriage lasted 20-some years. There is so much from that experience that I haven’t let go of yet. Why? I can’t answer the question, I really can’t. What am I hanging onto and why? I keep thinking about how the stream spoke yesterday and it’s meaning seems so clear in yet another way today. Let it go, let it go, life is about clearing and flow, let it go. I suffer because I haven’t let go. The message in that stream seems so crystal clear. Let it go. Nature’s voice can be so unambiguous and uncomplicated. Why do we hang on to old hurts? I really don’t know.

One Response to “Letting Go”

  1. Darita-Rose Alden Says:

    Oh, girlfriend, I can so relate to what you said. This past Friday would have been the 33rd anniversary for me, and I have been thinking about you today. I too am having a hard time picking up the pieces. I’m glad that you wrote this, because I keep wondering why it is taking me so long to get over the devastation. It’s actually good that I moved away from LA, because I couldn’t stop obsessing and acting out in unhealthy ways. On my would-be anniversary, I had an odd dream, very short, but I emailed it to my Jungian therapist who saw a lot in it, and she said that dreams on these anniversaries do mean something more than other dreams. Trying not to argue w reality, but it’s hard! I think that you were more severely betrayed than I was, much as I was.

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